Talking about sex
Award-winning newsletter helps teens understand their sexuality
Archived article from Oct 6, 2000
By Nancy Parello
Sex is good: Hearts, roses, love and devotion.
Sex is bad: Death, disease, heartbreak and despair.
So which is it?
Neither, says the teen editorial board of Sex, Etc., an award-winning newsletter published by the Network for Family Life Education, part of the Center for Social and Community Development of the School of Social Work. It's a choice that should be made carefully, with maturity and responsibility.
That's the underlying message that permeates every issue of Sex, Etc., say its teen writers and adult advisers.
"American teens are not allowed to understand their own sexuality," says Zandile Blay, a Jersey City teen-ager who has served on the Sex, Etc. editorial board for three years. "On the one hand, we hear it's wrong for teens to have sex. It's almost like we'll die if we do. On the other hand, we see sex everywhere. It's like it goes with love and all that good stuff that every teen wants. Sex, Etc. helps us deal with all the grayness in between."
That focus on healthy sexuality for teens along with the special voice that comes from its teen writers has made the publication a huge success. Circulation has soared from 10,000 when it was started in 1994 to about 580,000 today.
Plus, the newsletter's Web site attracts more than 3,000 users every day. Online, teens can access all past articles, as well as ask questions of the network's sexuality experts.
According to Susan Wilson, executive coordinator of the network, Sex, Etc. was started in response to a demand from teen-agers for more accurate, honest information about sex. "We kept hearing from teens, again and again, that the sex education they received was too little, too late.' So we wanted to give them a publication that would answer their very real and pressing questions."
The network was formed in 1981 to help implement a state requirement for family life education in public schools. It acts as a resource, offering advocacy and technical assistance and training teachers to implement the state's mandate. The network also puts out another newsletter, Family Life Matters, to help sex educators better teach sensitive subjects using the latest teaching strategies.
The first edition of Sex, Etc. circulated to 10,000 New Jersey teens. Once word got out, more and more adults who work with teens began clamoring for issues. Eventually, the newsletter spread across the country and is now circulated in 50 states.
Sex, Etc. is distributed free to teens through adult advisers who work in schools, family planning clinics, churches, juvenile justice organizations and places with programs for teens. A discussion guide that outlines specific lessons accompanies each issue and gives teachers concrete ways to explore these sensitive subjects.
The teens involved in the project benefit, too. They spend a lot of time researching, interviewing and writing about health topics related to their sexuality. They get help from a professional journalist and experienced health educators. All stories are double-checked for accuracy.
These teens aren't afraid to tackle some tough questions: Does sex equal love? What's the first time really like? Do guys give love to get sex? Do girls give sex to get love? Should you have to tell your parents if you want an abortion?
They also delve into topics often considered taboo for teens oral sex, masturbation, sexual pleasure. "This is a very bold newsletter," says Wilson. "But kids need to understand, react and talk about these subjects."
Ankur Dalal, 18, of Fanwood, another editor, says the newsletter also helps teens understand people who may practice different lifestyles. "Sex, Etc. offers different perspectives,'' he explains.
"Some of the things we print are so foreign to the people in my school, like the articles on the gay/straight alliance. The articles help broaden people's perspective on the world.''
Unraveling the mystery of sex for teens helps them make better choices, says Wilson. Research backs this up. In April 1998, Amherst Professor Catherine Sanderson conducted a study funded by the N.J. Department of Human Services' Office of Prevention to find out whether Sex, Etc. changes teens' attitudes. The study found that students' views on marijuana and other drugs became more negative, while their attitudes toward abstinence and waiting to have sex became more positive. It also showed that students generally liked reading the newsletter, with urban teens saying it helped them the most.
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